day twenty five, and hunger hits for the first time.
I’m sitting in silence today, mind mapping a 20 Year Game here in this big ol' empty room. I needed to speak of the Shadow self here in this space the other night, but today my flesh and soul is back at work, weaving something new. Like a spider crafting a web to collect what nourishes; I am collecting the puzzle pieces and tools to move forward and bring about the life I want to build. Rich earth, a family that looks a little like Tyler, and a little like me, and the ability to sustain by writing and creating the container for others. Before I go get lost in year 2032 details, I want to say
I utterly and completely love you.
The stories you reflected back to me yesterday, through comments and private msgs. taught me something that I hadn’t experienced firsthand- the Shadows that we all keep need Space. I have been working so hard at starving the skeleton woman, refusing to give her space to speak and space to be heard, that I have become ‘stuck’. Healing isn't complete with a declaration of the past, no matter how recent it may be; but I find, for myself, that allowing room for my Shadow to be seen is a baptism of my most honest self.
For that, love, I am full of gratitude for you holding that Space for me.
And not only for me.
But Tyler as well.
I hope he and I get a chance in this life to share dinner with you- our most honest Self gathering together around the dinner table to break bread and pass the homemade stew. Of course I would insist on a game, and naturally he would insist circling around the fire pit, telling stories about a time when we loved things just because. To have you here is a blessing for us. Thank you, for that.
xo.
laura em
(ps- this evening I'm settling in to really reflect on and respond to your msgs. to me from yesterday. But in the meanwhile, get risky to do your own shedding and hop over to Hello, Autumn to participate tomorrow. Check in sometime during the day to let us know what you are releasing. A pile of clothes? False image? Clutter in the pantry? Dairy products? Share & inspire).
